Crossroad In The Way Of Understanding People

In life you come across many crossroads. They are of many categories. They will make you think and decide about the issues. But what if the crossroads are coming in the process of the decision making itself.

I always try to find answers, rather explanations, to everything that is happening around me. It always irritates me not to have the explanations. Sometimes I even pay a very big price to obtain knowledge about something that is concerning me and consider as my gain even though in general notion it does not seem so.

So, it is of no wonder that I always try to get the explanations of any given situation or anything that is happening to me.

No matter how hard you try, you end up expecting in every sphere of life. As of now, without practice of meditation or something similar, one is bound to have lost control of your desires. So in our lifestyles, expectations are mostly inevitable. But what are the consequences?

You expect something. That means there is usually 50% of chance that you will not get that. Also, expectations are supposed to be fulfilled by a person  who is NOT you.

What if you expect something, and then it does not happen. Then a situation comes where you cannot have that something and now the people, whom you thought would fulfil your expectation when there was a chance, starts saying how they want to fulfil them and cannot do now only because the current situation does not give them any chance. When just maybe two days ago situation was such and they just ignored it.

It also may happen that there might be a chance that such situation might come again. First they make sure that the situation does not happen. Then they will say had it been that way, they could have done this and that.

All I want to say that I am now growing up. Although it is very late, but I am happy that I know tomorrow when I shall be going to bed, I will be more mature than today. I learnt many things about life in very harsh ways as I was late. So I am going to believe whatever I understand instead of what I am told. Because only your thinking process and views will remain with you till the end. Anyway, people believe whatever they want to believe. This also is my observation. So as a part of growing up, I shall also go by this rule.

But on the same note I know this also, that I will not stop believing in people. That is the last thing one should do. But what you will believe about them is choice that left to you by the Matrix.. :P
I will take the crossroads that suits me. I guess that is what everybody does.

Be Careful What You Wish For

I am a very big fan of Dr. House. He sometimes says "you can't always get what you want." I too believed that, until very recently. As you cannot get what you want immediately, this might seem true for some time. Some of my experiences made me think in other ways.


I saw this documentary "Law of Attraction" (not the movie) almost three years ago. It says right attitude of having something already accomplished which is not accomplished yet, will actually help you to reach that destination. Of course it sounds absurd at first. But I believed that positive attitude is much better than a negative one.


Also in a conversation around two and a half years back, a good friend asked me if at the back of my mind I was still interested in physics or not. I was not doing well with my studies. It made me think that whatever idea you dump on the back of your mind, you consciously may forget it. But it stays there and has effects on all your future actions. They can as well be analysed and understood nicely from that point of view.


Observations show that apparently strong dams built on rivers are required regular maintenance, even though the calculated shock that can absorbed without any damage is more than the actual force the river exerts for a given amount of time. Similarly, it may be inferred shows that if you continuously let something stay at the back of your head, it affects your action in achieving or fulfilling those ideas.


That is why I realised that whatever you want, make sure you want it in the long run. Because if it is not, you might not actually like it when you get it. But nothing can be done then as everybody would know what you were up to all these times and all the situations created were already very strong to not let go off the thing you wanted all these years due to your actions. So, I think it would be wise to take time to decide wisely what you really want instead of not liking it much later. Be careful what you wish for, it might come true.

Human Nature: As I Found It

As I am trying to live my life rather than merely existing as mentioned in many great people's quotes, I keep coming across many astonishing revelations about human nature. Since our interactions and involvements are mostly with other humans, this continues to intrigue me.


I had a habit of reading classic novels and short stories and also old English poems (mostly of romantic age). My father being a English literature student, I had relatively easier access to these classics. I read many such works at, one can say, an unprepared age. Some of them, if I am lucky enough to find a correlation with something in real life struck me very hard. Some of them did not.


I somehow always restrained myself from learning about human nature through human interactions as most of the time I used to find this action inseparable from judging people by their actions. Well, until very recently. I realised that probably it is necessary for living comfortably, for not getting hurt again and again.


So, now that I have decided to start learning from first hand human interactions, I started realising that almost all words in them have a significance. So, I may realise something new today, but when I think about it, it is very much normal to the world already.


One of the lessons that recently I learnt about human nature is that people will do whatever they feel important anyway and find and excuse to not do whatever they feel is not important. This is true every time. No matter what your relation is with that person, be it your parents, best friend, teacher, that special someone or even your admirer. It does not matter what prejudice you have about them or what you may would like them to do. And no matter how much important you think something is, if another human does not think it is, my experience says, better expect them to do the opposite. Less disappointment for you.


But in the end, it's all good I think. Life, after all is just a ride. People with different point of view will keep coming and neither you it's worth the effort to avoid them, and not you should. I think enjoying the ride is all that matters.

Truth, Knowledge and Realisations

I always felt this unquenchable thirst for knowledge. About everything. I always wanted to know the truth. What exactly is going on behind the scene, everywhere, what is the impact of my words or deeds; how exactly it is affecting the world. As I grew up with a mentality like this, mostly I remain truthful to people (with a few exceptions of not telling my parents about going out with a girl or that I failed in my last geography exams). And, somehow in turn expecting the people to be truthful to me too. I always appreciated if they let me know what exactly they think of me and if some problem arises I preferred talking about it point blank.

As I became involved in this world more and more, I went through many realisations, mostly cyclic. Nevertheless, I still was eager to know what was always going on behind the scene. I always believed truly that the truth can and shall set me free, free from this vicious cycles of realisations. It always gave me the opportunity to come out of an incident and look into the matter objectively, needless to say which helped me every time even if there was no apparent problem.

But as I became somewhat more involved with the people of this world, I came to realise that it may not be always wise to dig to depth to bring out the truth. The very reason that you have to dig deeply, is also the reason of the violence once the truth comes out and somehow suddenly it did not matter anymore to anybody except yourself. To be very frank, what I have realised, people will behave in whatever way they want to behave, no matter what they told you before and in the process of knowing the truth you also come across the "falseness" of their words. Somehow it made me feel that the truth may only matter to a few people and for the rest, is whatever make them feel better.

In this process, I also came to know that I may not like the truth. But that never told upon my strong desire of making the truth come out. What did was my own action also along with others' participation after I made the truth come out from them. Though I heard this many times that it certainly is not wise to know the truth every time, I am not sure about the credibility of the words. Even when I realise that the truth may make things worse, may make me feel worse, I still have this of desire in my mind, like a splinter, to know the truth.

“There is no friend as loyal as a book” ― Ernest Hemingway

I started liking books since my childhood, same for most of the people I guess. I used to read them over and over and so never ran out of books to read. This compelled my mother to hide the books during my exam time as I used to perform poorly. I remember sometimes I could discover where she hid them and its feeling was similar to climbing a tough peak.

Then I grew up (my age increased). I started finding my hiding place inside them. To be very frank, I am a dull human being. I sometimes fail to tune with the outside world. So, for my peace of mind I learnt to turn to them whenever I feel lonely. It never disappointed me.

I came to college. I became exposed to many aspects of life which I did not know of. I became aware of incompleteness of life and the necessity of it. And I dived deeper into the so-called ocean of life.

At first I couldn't enjoy. I thought its because I was learning how to swim.

Many days went by. Few moments of joy, some heart-breaking and a lot of indifference happened to me. And now towards the end of my college, as I am trying to evaluate what I was doing in this ocean, I realised that what I learnt is simply how to dance at the small waves and avoiding the larger ones. What it felt to me was something similar to a subject, student of which can either perform as a general graduate or can teach that subject to produce similar students.

Now once again, I looked back at the books. Whenever I felt lack of fulfilment from the 'real' world, I turned back to it. To my joy, I found when almost everything has changed in my life, these fellows are still loyal to me, rather in the time of need its usefulness is more felt and it becomes irreplaceable.

I would like to think that, one of my favourites, Wordsworth has written the poem thinking about the books instead of the daffodils. They only truly have given me the "bliss of solitude."

That's Too Easy You See...

I sometimes wondered about and became astonished with an observation. I felt that every time in a relatively difficult situations, I am performing better. I tried to find the reason by myself as it seems counter-intuitive. I also have heard some explanations from the others. The explanations that I heard are mostly like this that, the people who find difficult situations advantageous are usually unable to solve simpler problems and that is why their performances drop when simpler situations demands a quick solutions. As one can see that this explanation itself is also against our normal thinking since it violates the very paradigm of easy and tough.

I thought of another explanation of this situation which essentially emphasises on the very basic difference between the natures of simpler and relatively tougher problems. It also is connected to the idea of time.

I was playing this game "Mahjong" in my computer, as I sometimes do in a lazy morning. I switched from an easy map to the toughest map. Well it didn't surprise me that much, I mean the result. It took me less time than the best time I scored in the easiest. I was playing the toughest for the first time. And then it clicked my mind.

I asked myself what is the difference that is benefiting me in some way. And then it also taught me something about myself. What I felt that the essential difference that distinguishes between an easy situation with a tougher one is that most of the time is the number of solutions a situation comes with. What defines a tough situation, is usually it presents itself with one possibility or maybe a few but very much less compared to an easy one.

The trick of finding the solution is hence also differs. When one wants to solve an easy problem, they try to find a solution or if more sincere the most appropriate solution which fits the situation. But in the other case, one tries to find "the" solution.

I find the first situation tougher. Its more like engineering to science. One has to note that I am referring easy and tough in its conventional sense. The second case demands the solution and does not requires to consider the situation since anyway, solution is exclusive. Maybe the idea is to simplified. But it taught me that most of the time I give up after finding an answer. While it works with the second situation relatively well, it does very badly with the first ones since challenge most of the time is to find the most appropriate answer in the least amount of time.

It also told upon my performance during the placement session which I had at my college in this December. The only three times I cleared the first round of the aptitude tests was they gave fewer problems which requires quite a large amount of thinking and time given to solve them was much more than that is given during the other kinds of question sets which requires solving many relatively simpler problems in a very less amount of time.

I believe a person should be balanced in both ways. Otherwise they must find a suitable job and situation which exploits their better quality which is almost always impossible as there are plenty of unavoidable situations life comes with. So, all the best!!